France 0, Uruguay 0 but at least now we know: There is a footballing god. And he has a delicious sense of irony

FRANCE’S dreadful 0-0 draw against Uruguay proved just one thing. There is a footballing God. And He has an acute sense of irony.

The second game of the World Cup at Green Point in Cape Town – another great stadium, another great surface – did little to warm the heart of the 64,000 fans.

But there was a delicious moment late in the game when Thierry Henry was denied a penalty for handball. Yes, that’s the Hand of Gaul Henry, who used his arm like a basketball player to put the Republic of Ireland out of this World Cup.

As an Arsenal fan, that moment ruined a hero for me, I dubbed it the Hand of Frog which obviously I'd never repeat. It's rude. But as a third-generation Irishman I was furious.

Was it only last November? The party-loving Irish would have brought so much to this tournament but with 17 minutes to go in the second leg of the qualifying play-off, there was Henry, controlling the ball with his arm and playing it across goal for William Gallas to equalise for the home side in Paris.

The arguments, the appeals to FIFA, the demands for a replay, a petition of a million Irishman in a paddy. They even asked at parliamentary level if they could be the 33rd side at South Africa 2010.

But FIFA, as always, refused to do what the public demanded, what justice demanded. France were through after winning at Croke Park. And Henry? He admitted culpability immediately afterwards and apologised... but was never given any kind of punishment.

At the very least, video evidence should have been used to ban him from the first couple of games of this tournament for deliberate hand-ball.

But nothing happened. And here's the wonderful irony. After an interminable 81 minutes, Uruguay substitute Nicolas Lodeiro was sent off. Already booked, his studs-up challenge on Arsenal full-back Bacary Sagna left the referee with no choice.

That opened the game up for the French and in the 88^th minute their chance to end this stultifying stale mate appeared to have dawned. Henry picked up the ball on the far post and Mauricio Victorino used his hand to keep the ball and the 32-year-old at bay. But Japanese referee Nishimura saw nothing. Just as Swedish whistler Hanssen saw nothing last November.

And that was it. Henry had a late free-kick but his aura is gone. It bobbled off the wall. The Jabulani ball is doing nobody any favours. Diego Forlan had the best chance for Uruguay but it ballooned wide, just as every free-kick on day one did.

Gavin Hunt, the watching Supersports United manager who has won the last three South African Premier League titles, told me: “We’ve played with the World Cup ball for six months. I told them it was too light, far too light. It bobbles, it swerves. I told them we prefer the heavier Mitre ball, especially at altitude. But by then it was too late, they were in production.”

A balls-up then. And a dull draw in Cape Town after the excitement of the opening 1-1 deadlock between the hosts and Mexico at Soccer City. But Hunt was smiling for once: “This is a good result for South Africa. I can’t see either of those sides presenting any real problems for Carlos Alberto Parreira.”

In summary then, 162,000 fans, mostly vuvuzela-blowing South Africans, witnessed a flawless opening ceremony and two draws. No bloodbaths in evidence, no earthquakes, muggings or deadly snakes. Just a few traffic jams and handbags being thrown in the second half of the Green Point grind. Not a bad opening day for the nation they said could never host a World Cup.

Neal Collins (nealcol on Twitter) is in South Africa promoting his book A GAME APART. For more details see www.nealcollins.co.uk. To see video of the World Cup's breathtaking first goal, see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEJwrVHR06I

Smith was out for 15. But now he's got 84 and South Africa have got this one in the bag

SOUTH AFRICAN captain Graeme Smith enjoyed an incredible let off as the second day of the final Test at the Wanderers got underway amid growing controversy this morning.

Luckless England were all out for a paltry 180 yesterday as their attempt to engineer the draw that would clinch this absorbing series fell flat. They were able to take only one wicket as South Africa moved from their overnight 29-0 to 160-1 at lunch today with Smith looking imperious on 84 off 155 balls and the reliable Hashim Amla also unbeaten on 53 off 80.

Together they have put on 125 in 30 overs – a record second-wicket partnership at this historic ground against England – at a cracking rate of just over four an over. Only rain can save England now, and the clouds are rolling in after a bright morning.

A win for South Africa– which would see this absorbing series drawn 1-1 and the hosts retain the Basil D’Oliviera trophy – looks more likely by the over.

And with every run Smith makes, England’s sense of frustration will grow given the events of this morning, where the review system once more failed to ensure Test cricket isfree of grinding injustice.

The South African leader, not the most lovable of cricketers, should have been long gone. After patiently guiding his side through a sticky evening session involving a rain break and floodlights last night, he had a wild slash at birthday boy Ryan Sidebottom after just four overs this morning – when he had scored just 15.

Sidebottom, 32 today, certainly thought Smith had got a touch to wicketkeeper Matt Prior with his uncharacteristic attempted cut off the final ball of his second over – and the entire England side went up with Stuart Broad particularly vociferous in his appeal, marching around his his arms up.

While on-field umpire Tony Hill remained curiously unmoved, England captain Andrew Strauss immediately called for a review. And after the initial problems with the new-fangled system, he only does that when he’s sure something’s wrong.

The music played, the replays rolled... and England’s celebrating fielders could hardly believe it when television umpire Daryl Harper said he heard nothing on the stump mike and backed New Zealander Hill’s not-out verdict.

Ashes-winner Matthew Hoggard, emerging from the SABC commentary box, told me: “There was a definite noise. I don’t understand why it wasn’t given. Once we’d turned the sound up, it was quite clear.

“Perhaps the television umpire had a problem with the feed from the pitch mike. But without hotspot, it’s so difficult.”

Hotspot technology shows an infra-red image of where the ball hits the bat. Though it is functioning for reviews in Australia’s current series against Pakistan, it is not available here, making catches behind difficult to give.

But since then I’ve even had fans coming up saying they heard the nick – and texts from South African fans in London, watching Sky, laughing at their captain’s luck. In fact, I’ve just been interviewed by SABC television, giving the Evening Standard’s verdict on their conscience-free captain.

Australian television umpire Harper, already under fire for not giving a no ball when Alastair Cook was out LBW yesterday, will come under further scrutiny from the England camp – though Paul Collingwood said last night England were more acceptant of that decision after further review of the tapes.

But he confirmed England coach Andy Flower had made a brief visit to match referee Rohsan Mahanama after that decision.

Another visit may be required after Smith’s let off. The Standard’s Jon Agnew, seething in the Test Match Special box, twittered: “Interesting how Smith deals with this afterwards. Will it be a 'special' innings in light of having stood on 15? There will be replay after replay.”

England’s disappointment was eased an over later when they grabbed their only wicket of the morning (see picture above). Ashwell Prince prodded forward at Broad – who looked really fired-up this morning after being told where to go by Jacques Kallis when he got out yesterday – and the thick edge flew to Graeme Swann at slip. No doubt about that one.

The first slip catch of the Test so far left South Africa, 29-0 after those 12 sticky overs last night, 36-1 in the 17^th over. But that was as good as it got for England.

The batsman formerly known as Prince (as they like to call him here) did brilliantly to survive two hostile spells amid the rain break and badlight last night, but all that hard work -19 runs off 48 balls - was in vain and he attempted to fend off a good, rising delivery.

Amla marched out to join his captain and together they survived a difficult early morning session. With the sun baking the life out of yesterday’s jumpy strip – and limiting the swing for England’s seamers - South Africa’s 50 came up six overs into the morning session.

Broad and Sidebottom were getting movement and finding a good length... but without the constant menace provided by the pace of Dale Steyn and Morne Morkel in their devastating opening 12-over spell yesterday, when four England wickets fell for less than 40 runs.

As Steyn said last night: “When you have conditions like this, where the ball is doing things off a track like this, you have to fill you boots. It doesn’t happen that often in Test cricket – but it often happens at the Wanderers.”

Steyn, who took 5-51 yesterday, also expressed his surprise at the decision to axe Graham Onions – the legendary No11 bat and useful seamer – for Sidebottom. He said: “Sir Graham Onions, that’s what they’re calling him isn’t it? He might have been dangerous on this pitch. I don’t understand why they changed a winning side.”

Sidebottom was unable to justify the selectors’ decision with a wicket – he has bowled 13 overs, 0-32 so far- and before lunch England had resorted to the spin of Graeme Swann and the medium pace of Collingwood as smug Smith and ambling Amla helped South Africa take a stranglehold on the final Test.

Ireland plead for a 33rd place at the World Cup. Don't hold your breath. But we may get two more refs.

THE Thierry Henry handball fiasco, like Tiger Woods' mysterious car crash, just won't go away. Today, FIFA boss Sepp Blatter informs us the Republic of Ireland have asked for a 33rd place at the World Cup finals in South Africa next June - and he hinted two extra match officials may be used behind either goal at the tournament.

Ireland's reprieve is not going to happen. But it should. Lest we forget, Henry's basketball-style manipulation of the ball with his left arm led to the William Gallas goal which put France through at Ireland's expense in Paris a fortnight ago.

Right-thinking fans around the world - 345,000 of them on a Facebook petition alone, many of them French - demanded a replay. Even the Irish government became involved. But FIFA, being FIFA, declined the tidal wave of support for the replay without adequately explaining why.

Expect little better this time. Blatter, who appears to care only about certain countries and certain controversies (he allowed a replay between Uzbekistan and Bahraine over a disputed refereeing decision in a far less important World Cup qualifier) said only: "I will bring Ireland's request to the attention of the Executive Committee."

He might as well have told our inconsolable Irish neighbours: "Sorry, France are going, you're not. Ya boo."

Angry Irish fans won't be placated by the other titbit offered by Blatter, who finally admitted: "Something has to be done about match control" and suggested FIFA are thinking about introducing two extra officials for the tournament next year.

Once they have dismissed Ireland's request for an extra place at the table, the executive committee will hold "an emergency meeting" to discuss the addition of an extra match official behind either goal.

Their meeting takes place in Cape Town on Wednesday, two days ahead of Friday's eagerly-awaited World Cup draw, which will decide where and when each of the 32 nations plays.

But even if they agree to the change, it won't be put to the international board in Zurich until March. Blatter admitted: "We have only one man on the field of play who can intervene. He has two assistants for the time being, perhaps more in the future. He has to make an immediate decision.

"He has only two eyes. So match control is now is on the agenda. How shall we avoid such situations as we have seen in this very specific match? It's possible we will make additional officials for the World Cup but we have to see if it is feasible or realistic."

Unfortunately for Ireland, Costa Rica feel they were robbed by Uruguay too, citing an offside decision in their play-off defeat. That will, no doubt, be the excuse FIFA needs to keep Ireland out. They will argue if they let one side in, they'll have several demanding a place.

Unfazed, the FA of Ireland released a statement, confirming a 90-minute meeting with Blatter in Zurich last Friday.

The FAI said: "A lot was discussed at the meeting and at one stage the FAI asked if Ireland could be accommodated into the World Cup 2010.

"Other suggestions were also made to mitigate against further occurrences of such incidents, including the use of additional goal-line assistant referees for Fifa international matches, further use of video technology for matches at the highest level, stronger provisions to discourage players from engaging in such blatant breaches of the laws of the game and provisions to strengthen referee selection for such important matches."

Let's hope Blatter was paying attention. One day something might be done. But Ireland's exclusion will not be reversed... and their sense of injustice will take a long time to fade.