"The FIFA 2010 World Cup Finals in South Africa are fast approaching. John Terry is available to create effective brand awareness and endorse products and services globally. He has been voted one of the world's most influencial people."
Yes, influencial. Get the spell-checker out. Good old JT. Fluent in English he is. And in case his PR company have missed it, that's INFLUENTIAL mate. Except when it comes to taking penalties against Manchester United in European Cup finals in Moscow. Then he's just effluential.
The Daily Mail makes a huge deal of the selling of England's captain before next year's World Cup today, complaining he's "putting the nation's armband on sale". And they're right. It stinks. The man is on £170,000 a week. At least. A couple of years ago I sneaked a peek at an international star's monthly wage packet at Liverpool. Apart from the basic £82,000-a-week, he was paid all kinds of win bonuses, training bonuses, Champions League bonuses and extras to do with his house, car and sundries. I'm sure Terry gets plenty of that.
Yet here he is, six months before the greatest footballing show on earth, presenting himself as a marketing tool (rather an apt expression in this context) rather than quietly getting on with the job of leading England to the World Cup after 44 years of hurt. Sir Bobby Moore must be turning in his grave.
A company called Riviera Entertainment are behind the campaign (pictured). They were appointed by Elite Management, Terry's agents. Interestingly, Elite Management, to quote their press release "is owned and controlled by John Terry’s long term friends Paul Nicholls and Keith Cousins."
So at least we know it's not just John Terry who's getting millions for being England captain. All his pals are in on the act too.
The bits they don't mention in their puff for big John? His mum Sue was arrested for shoplifting £800 of goods including dog food and flip-flops from Marks & Spencers in March this year. His dad John Snr, was filmed arranging a drug deal by the News of the World earlier this month. The Daily Mail are quick to remind us of both points.
But we don't need to know that. Elite tell me: "Terry is the main face for the Umbro sportswear brand. He has also appeared in adverts for Samsung, Nationwide
and has been the face of King of Shaves. He has a sponsorship deal with football gaming series Pro Evolution Soccer, and appears on the cover of the UK version of ‘Pro Evolution Soccer 6’ with Brazilian international Adriano."
Thanks lads. Let's hope he gets lots more exposure in the build up to the World Cup. He deserves it. And perhaps on Sunday, when Chelsea could end Arsenal's title hopes and take an 11 point lead over the Gunners, he'll be too busy imagining his future riches to stop Eduardo's hat-trick.
We can dream...