AND SO THE WORLD CUP BEGINS: Brazil 3-1 Croatia with a helping hand from the referee (as predicted)

Neymaaaaaaaaar: Brazil open their account

And so it begins. The careful manipulation of the greatest footballing event on earth. With protests and stun grenades in the streets, FIFA couldn’t afford to see hosts Brazil get off to a bad start.

But they did. Right from that early Marcelo own goal, Filip Scolari’s fired-up side found themselves frustrated and flustered against a determined Croatia, who were never markedly outplayed by the Samba nation.

Neymar, as expected, produced the equaliser… but after Stipe Pletikosa’s early bravery his long range, poorly hit shot looked gettable for an international stopper.

IF YOU DON'T ACCEPT MY VIEW, TRY THIS FROM CROATIA COACH NIKO KOVAC: "If that's how we start the World Cup, we'd better give it up now and go home. We talk about respect, that wasn't respect, Croatia didn't get any. If that's a penalty, we don't need to play football anymore. Let's play basketball instead, it's a shame."

The second half just never unfolded like Brazil hoped it would. With the crowd getting increasingly agitated, the Neymar penalty winner I’d been predicting all day on twitter (feel free to check my timeline at www.twitter.com/nealcol) was almost inevitable.

Japanese referee Yuichi Nishimura watched Fred control the ball poorly and lean in to the defender before tumbling dramatically backwards. And without hesitation, he pointed to the spot. It was Fred’s most important – possibly his only – meaningful contribution in Sao Paulo. And as Ryan Giggs confirmed afterwards, it was NEVER a penalty.

Robbed: Croatia reaction

Neymar stuck the penalty away – though Pletikosa got both hands to it – and my twitter timeline was immediately swamped by those shocked that I had so accurately predicted the “Brazil must win” scenario.

The white sangoma had struck again, they said. I had thrown the bones. A dodgy Neymar penalty, just as I predicted. But in truth, it was always going to happen. There is no sorcery here. As I told Bloemfontein Celtic-bound Bevan Fransman as events unfolded, when you’ve watched as many World Cups as I have, you expect the dodgy decisions and obedient referees.

Croatia then pummeled the Brazil goal at 1-2 down and could have levelled twice before they put the ball in the net, only for Nishimura to call a foul on Julio Cesar in the Brazil goal. He didn’t even have the ball in his hands. A second glaring mistake.

Oscar – sparkling throughout – toe-punted a third past the hapless Pletikosa to seal the win and leave “experts” grovelling about an “emphatic” Brazilian victory on televisions globally in numerous different languages.

Oscar thanked God for the win, he should
have thanked Japanese ref Nishimura

Of course, it’s their job to “sell” the tournament when corporations pay millions to screen the World Cup. Around the world, analysts will talk of a bright, lively opening game. Four goals is a lot better than usual for the World Cup kick-off. Great start for the hosts.

At least the former Manchester United legend Ryan Giggs, guesting in South Africa, had the gumption to admit: "Fred went down easily. It wasn't a penalty. The referee made a clear mistake." But then: “We’re off to a flying start, an emphatic win for Brazil,” said Premier League presenter John Dykes at the end of SuperSport’s analysis which goes the length of Africa. Bollockz.

In truth, particularly if you’re Croatian, there was only injustice to speak of. The penalty, the disallowed goal. Obvious and calculated. FIFA know where their bread is buttered.

They can put up with a shoddy Opening Ceremony with a terrible sound system. They can accept unfinished stadia. But they can’t risk further angering the Brazilian people after their $11 BILLION spend on this World Cup.

AND HOW ABOUT THIS FROM South American football expert Tim Vickery on the BBC: "Protests are planned outside the stadiums for every game. How this pans out I don't think anyone knows for sure. Two situations could make things worse - police reaction, or the nightmare scenario for Brazilian authorities which is Brazil exiting the tournament early.

"Disappointing performances on the field could fuel the fire of anger. You do wonder if Brazil get hometown decisions more often because it was would be a disaster if Brazil exited this tournament early."

Any rational governing body would have a look at both Nishimura’s whistling and Pletikosa’s keeping. But they won’t. It’s done. We move on.

On day two, we see Mexico v Cameroon at 6pm CAT (a real chance for Africa to get off to a flying start, Mexico needed a play-off against New Zealand to get to Brazil); the momentous rerun of the 2010 World Cup final between holder Spain and Holland at 9pm and Chile against lowest ranked Australia at midnight.

Great games in prospect. But for me, the opening night leaves a sour taste. Not many will say that, but I’m afraid it’s the truth.

SOCCERBALLZ! my innovative football show on www.ballz.co.za with Mark Fish airs every Thursday from 9am-11am. See Ballz' channel for our growing library of fascinating football interviews with the big names. Ballz will also provide daily World Cup updates from next week.

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Inside story: the curious tale of Bafana Bafana, Carlos Queiroz, Roger de Sa and Gordon Igesund

Job swap? Gordon Igesund and
Pirates ex-boss Roger De Sa

Roger and out. To some Orlando Pirates, that news came as a blessing. Brighter Buccaneers know full well it could prove to be DeSasterous.

The minute Roger de Sa livened up transfer deadline day with his resignation just minutes after the window creaked shut on Friday night, I tweeted exactly what I believe to be true: That the Mozambique-born former Bafana goalkeeper is all set to join Carlos Queiroz in the Bafana Bafana set-up after the World Cup in Brazil.

With Gordon Igesund yet to submit his CHAN report to SAFA’s technical committee that may have appeared a little premature. Gordon’s contract runs until July, a lot of people think Igesund deserves more time.

But the hand had been forced. In the Sunday Times, Roger said: “Right now my batteries are flat. I had a heart-to-heart with Dr Irvin Khoza (the Pirates chairman) and told him I was battling to motivate myself in the morning.

“I said I wanna go. He was quite surprised. But I told him I couldn’t give 100 percent. It’s not good for me, for you, the club or the fans.”

With that, Roger was gone. But he can go with his head held high. When he took over from Augusto “Bad Back” Palacios last season, Pirates were 10^th in the PSL. They ended third and he leaves with a remarkable record of reaching three successive cup finals. With Eric Tinkler in the caretaker role, Pirates could yet reach third when they’ve caught up with the rest.

True, he lost the Champions League, MTN8 and Telkom Knock-out at the final hurdles, but he did bring in R13.7m in the process. And most of the players, for all the “sinister” forces at work in the club, had good things to say about Roger’s reign.

The truth is, Pirates had a Belgian coach with African experience (I won’t name him), living in the Protea Wanderers hotel for weeks last year waiting for De Sa to slip up in the African Champions League.  He didn’t. He produced miracles at TP Mazembe and in the group stages to keep his side in the running against all expectations.

And throughout his reign, De Sa had to put up with interference from Stanley “Screamer” Tshabalala, Khoza, Floyd Mbele and several others on matters of team selection and tactics before, during and after vital games. Ask Lucky Lekgwathi, Fatau Dauda and Tlou Segolela about the chaos behind the scenes.

It had to come to an end. Roger’s patience had been tried to the limit, and he was pelted by missiles when Pirates drew with AmaZulu last month.

But relief was at hand. A couple of weeks ago I heard (from an impeccable source) Carlos Queiroz had approached Pirates, asking if Roger, 49, could assist him during Iran’s World Cup quest in Brazil later this year. Roger’s late dad Octavio knew Queiroz, 60, and the pair worked together before, both during Queiroz’s previous Bafana reign (2000-2002, played 20, lost four) and with Portugal at the World Cup here in 2010.

Despite insults and denials on my twitter time-line, Pirates fans woke up on Sunday morning with the newspapers echoing my tweets: Roger did not simply leave because he was weary at Pirates, he left because he has exciting new opportunities ahead.

Cape Town is not one of them. Yet. Ajax Amsterdam insist they have not even spoken to De Sa, though most of the football media put together Muhsin Etrugral’s recent departure with De Sa’s resignation to make a phantom marriage of convenience.

Etrugral, returning to Turkey following a bereavement, was quoted yesterday saying: "I have not spoken to anybody from Pirates. I'm flying to Istanbul to sort out some family matters."

Nothing is set in stone yet. It could be that Ajax, with backing from Amsterdam, could yet go for Roger. It’s possible Igesund could talk his way out of trouble when he tries to justify his CHAN disaster this week. The exchange rate will make it difficult for SAFA to pay Queiroz the required salary – he’s on R22m a year with Iran.

But ultimately, I believe Roger and Carlos (both born in Mozambique) will be in charge of South Africa after doing the World Cup together with Iran later this year. I think Gordon will be sacked – and rightly so – and he could even go to Orlando Pirates next, given his agent Mike Makaab’s relationship with Dr Khoza.

Sadly, none of the principle characters involved can confirm or deny much of these details as there is too much at stake. South African football thrives on secrecy and back-stabbing. Any conversations right now are strictly off the record, nothing can be said out loud for fear of upsetting Dr Khoza, Makaab, SAFA or Igesund.

But I for one would be more than happy for South Africa to begin their post-CHAN recovery in July with Queiroz and De Sa running the show for Bafana in their new Nike kit. In the meantime, Shakes Mashaba (or Igesund if he insists on working out his contract) will take charge for pre-World Cup friendlies against Brazil and other heavyweights.

But remember, South Africa will not be in Brazil later this year. Iran and Queiroz will. And we all know why.

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World Cup heartbreak: Bafana Bafana beaten by the greatest headed own goal you are ever likely to witness

Somewhere amid the wreckage of South Africa’s failed World Cup campaign, we must pick up the pieces and assess the real value of Ethiopia’s quite unbelievable 2-1 win over brave Bafana Bafana on Sunday.


NOTE: Breaking News of Ethiopia possible points deduction at the foot of this story.

It was never about altitude. It was about attitude. And Gordon Igesund’s men had that in spades in lofty Addis Ababa. The opening goal from Bernard Parker gave the nation hope, the real prospect of a THIRD weekend success after highly-fortunate results for both our cricketers in Cardiff and our rugby team in Mbombela.

Then came the Ethiopia equaliser minutes before half-time. Hearts in mouths time. Anything less than a win wasn’t going to be enough for South Africa, with Botswana at home to come while the Ethiopians would be left to beat bottom-of-the-group Central African Republic.

Yes for fully 20 minutes, Bafana outplayed the home side, despite a raucous gathering of 25,000 inside the stadium and 10,000 outside. The winner looked like it would come at any moment.

Tokela Rantie, the Malmo striker curiously ejected by Orlando Pirates, very nearly scored with his first series of touches when he came on as a substitute. The Ethiopians, hacking down any South African on the run, were giving away copious free-kicks in dangerous positions.

The Ethiopians, workmanlike at best in their enthusiasm to qualify for a first every World Cup, were just not threatening. Until one of the most bizarre moments you are every likely to see in football. The cross comes in. Parker rises to clear. But the ball pinged off his head at pace from fully 18 yards to nestle in the corner of his Kaizer Chiefs club-mate Itumeleng Khune’s net.

There are own goal and there are own goals. I, personally, have scored several in my low level career. Seen plenty at all levels. But never quite one as devastatingly accurate as Parker’s mis-cued header.

Few sides would recover from such a blow. The ghost of unpaid sangomas immediately appeared over Igesund’s brave effort to overcome that chaotic start  to Group A, with Pitso Mosimane failing to beat Ethiopia at home before caretaker Steve Komphela’s draw against Botswana in Gaborone.

For all the huff and puff at the end, looking for an equaliser which would have only made elimination more painful, there was never going to be a miracle in the chaotic final 15, with Ethiopians queueing up for the time-wasting stretcher and ball-boys throwing the ball the wrong way.

And so it was done. Gordon was there at the end, saying things like “We did all we could, I can’t fault the players for their effort” with Khune, the man who has raised time-wasting to an art form, complaining about… erm time-wasting.

Afterwards we had Dean Furman, who has single-handedly revived the art of the slide tackle, telling the nation how sorry he was on twitter. And also pointing out that the one of the Ethiopians had spat in his face.

It was not a great end to Father’s Day, Soweto Day, Youth Day… whatever you want to call it. And there were the predictable calls for heads to roll. Personally I think Gordon Igesund deserves more time to finish what he started.

The improvement in Bafana’s form is hard to ignore. Sunday’s bizarre defeat came at the end of an eight-match unbeaten run in competition for Igesund. There were real positives, a good spirit in the camp.

But nothing can persuade a broken-hearted nation that our footballers fell short only because they lacked the luck on show when the Proteas sneaked a tie with the West Indies to progress in the ICC Champions Trophy or the Springboks benefited from a yellow card and a penalty try against Scotland the brave on the lowveld on Saturday.

Now we must look at what Ethiopia have to do to actually make it to Brazil and the World Cup next year. Côte d'Ivoire – with their Toure brothers and vast array of European stars - and seven-time AFCON winners Egypt are already through.

The Ivorians came back from behind to beat Tanzania 4-2 with Manchester City’s African Player of the Year scoring twice to leave Morocco short despite a 2-0 win over Gambia.

Ghana, another of the African heavyweights, will probably join them in the last ten after their 2-0 win over Lesotho in Maseru thanks to goals from Christian Atsu and captain Asamoah Gyan. They need a draw with 2012 AFCON champions Zambia to get through.

North African giants Tunisia and Algeria are also in the shake-up, with Gabon, the Congo and Burkina Faso making Group E impossible to call. Where does this leave Ethiopia, the world’s 105^th ranked side, in the shake-up?

Well, struggling to be honest. Depending how the draw works out, we’re looking at CAF succeeding as planned. The people Danny Jordaan describes as “the Arab powerhouses” look nailed on for Brazil. Egypt, Algeria, Tunisia…along with the Ivory Coast and Libya, who look like they’re going to oust Cameroon in Group I. And then we have the Ivory Coast and reigning AFCON champions Nigeria, who should see off Malawi in Group F.

It’s not a good time for Southern African teams… or English-speaking African nations. Issa Hayatou will shed no tears for us.


But there may still be hope: this just dropped on FIFA.COM:

FIFA can confirm that disciplinary proceedings have been opened against three member associations for each having allegedly fielded an ineligible player in the preliminary competition for the 2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil™.

The Ethiopian Football Association allegedly fielded an ineligible player in the match between Botswana and Ethiopia on 8 June 2013.

Link to full story here: http://www.fifa.com/worldcup/preliminaries/news/newsid=2110660/index.html

Player concerned is Minyahile Teshome Beyene, booked in first game against South Africa and against Botswana at home. He should have been suspended for win in Botswana. Gordon Igesund sent me a link to the story above last night after I'd posted this. He said: "If we'd known about this BEFORE the game I would have played for the draw! I went out trying to win, we played a veryopen style.

"Dean Furman was spat at, right in the face and their number five was BOOKED TWICE! Unbelievable own goal did for us. But hey, better to have a slight chance than none at all when we play Botswana in our last game."


Under under FIFA Disciplinary Code 55, sanction for fielding "ineligible" or banned player is 3pts deduction & €6000 fine.

If Ethiopia are deducted three points, it means Bafana must beat Botswana in their final game and hope Ethiopia draw in the Central African Republic. Then there are the play-offs. But a glimmer of hope, as Gordon said, is better than none.

If Ethiopia ARE deducted three points, it means Bafana must beat Botswana in their final game at home and hope Ethiopia draw in the Central African Republic (or at a neutral venue given the troubles in Bangui), both games due to be played on September 6.

Then there are the play-offs, five of them, pitting groups winners against group winners, a peculiar torture unique to Africa. But a glimmer of hope, as Gordon said, is better than none.

Kirsten Nematandani, the SAFA president, yesterday confirmed he would “wait patiently” for the results of the FIFA investigation. And he insisted: “We had nothing to do with the naming of this player.”

We wait. And hope.

When "What Can I Do?" simply isn't enough: the Pitso Mosimane story

The people have spoken: Pitso Mosimane

LIKE a character in a Nando’s advert, Pitso Mosimane could go up in smoke at any time, detonated amid a wave of drawophobia from a frustrated football-speaking nation.

The Bafana Bafana boss knew the writing was on the wall on Sunday night, after a yet another disappointing draw – this time a 1-1 stalemate against FIFA’s 138th-best country Ethiopia to open his first World Cup qualifying campaign.

Brazil 2014 seemed a long way off for all of us on Sunday night. For Mosimane, the 47-year-old from Kagiso, Rio de Janeiro may now be off the agenda after failing to win for nine games and pleading: “What can I do?”

Mosimane’s international coaching tensure could be barely more substantial than his 4-cap playing career for Bafana nearly ten years ago. Though I argued on eTV Sunrise and eNews yesterday that he should stay in charge for the second game against Botswana on Saturday, SAFA called an emergency meeting at their NASREC headquarters at 9am to discuss the future of the former Cosmos and Sundowns journeyman.
Eight hours later, Gordon Igesund had emerged as the favored candidate with Pitso back in Phokeng with the squad amid whispers of government intervention from Sports Minister Fikile Mbalula and Irvin Khoza on the warpath. Igesund is out of contract with Moroka Swallows at the end of the month and according to kick-off.com "negotiations are taking place" with SAFA.
As I write, that SAFA meeting is ongoing – perhaps his articulate assistant Steve Komphela is adding his input. By 11am, after 13 hours of dithering, SAFA had still failed to release anything official with a spokesman saying "there are procedures to be followed."

Komphela, the Free State Stars miracle-worker appointed by SAFA three months ago, may take over in Gaberone if Pitso goes up in smoke. The people’s choice, Igesund, remains in China on tour with his rebuilt Moroka Swallows but may still have time to take charge before Sunday. Gavin Hunt and Shakes Mashaba have also been mentioned. At least, as the social networks said yesterday, Komphela talks a good game.

And really, that was always Pitso’s problem. As No2 during the World Cup in 2010, he was friendly enough. But by the time he took over from Carlos Alberto Ferreira, the whispers had begun.

The non-qualifying celebrations after that infamous draw against Sierra Leone should have been the end of course. I remember asking a former team-mate and television analyst why nobody had told Pitso he needed a win rather than a draw to reach AFCON2012. He said: “I never speak to Pitso. Since he became Bafana boss he’s deleted my number from his phone and he never returns my calls.”

Since then of course, Bafana have failed to win again and again. Few were distracted by the non-payment of the sangoma who claimed to be responsible. And though South Africa produced a near-heroic final half-hour at the Royal Bafokeng Palace on Sunday, the winner just wouldn’t come after the alleged killer Katlego Mphela’s 77th-minute equaliser.

It was, to put it mildly, a Phokeng disappointment.

And Mosimane’s post-match efforts to justify his shortcomings were hardly glittering.

He said: “It is not for me to say whether I must stay or go. I don't even have to respond to what people say. The pressure is there and it will always be there. But we still have 15 points to play for, okay?

"Botswana won’t be easy but the team is fighting. It’s not as if we are losing. No, no, there is a little bit of integrity. We believe we can take three points in Botswana on Sunday.

"What can I do? The usual story happened, chances were created but we didn't take them. How do I sort out the problems of South African football? Siyabonga Nomvete has scored the most goals this season and I had him in the team.

“He scored 20 for Moroka Swallows. And we created chances, Hey! Let's have fair play. You see, in South Africa we don't want to accept reality.

“Things have not been going well for us since we won the 1996 Cup of Nations – but we still don’t change the formula. The world is catching up with us. We don't want to accept that we are not scoring goals. We don't want to accept that our development programmes are not good.

"It took Spain 80 years to win the World Cup, but they had to change. We don't change the formula yet we expect different results. Let’s be shrewd. Whether I'm here or not they will miss the chances.”

So we don’t know who will be Bafana boss in Botswana on Sunday (live at 3pm on SABC1). But here’s my suggested eleven to face the guns of Gaberone – with Nomvethe reduced to an impact substitute and Reneilwe Letsholonyane rested after a season marred by injury: Sandilands, Gaxa, Masenamela, Mathoho, Gould, Jali, Mahlangu, Pienaar, Modise, Mphela, Rodgers (or Serero if he's over bereavement).

FIFA Legacy Fund "Up and Running Within Days"... and Not Before Time

One year and two days after the gleaming World Cup closing ceremony at Soccer City, Danny Jordaan insists the promised $100m FIFA Legacy Fund is on the verge of materialising.

Jordaan, head of the South African organising committee, travelled to Zurich, Switzerland to conclude negotiations which will see the promised cash for “grass roots development” handed out to local communities.

Jordaan is believed to have finalised arrangements for the fund, which amounts to around R700m given current exchange rates.

So far just $25m of the promised fund has been spent – $20m on building the swanky SAFA headquarters near Soccer City which was completed before the tournament began and $5m on 50 buses already handed over to the regional SAFA branches.

On December 17, 2010, recently re-elected president Sepp Blatter said in Johannesburg: "FIFA are not a circus where we pitch our tent and remove them when the event is over. FIFA will leave a lasting legacy for the youth of South Africa.”

“We always said that the first World Cup on African soil should leave a lasting sports and social legacy. This trust is yet another concrete achievement in this area."

While the exchange rate has worked in his favour, Jordaan has been working for months to get the fund up and running, and he insists an eight-man board of trustees – two from FIFA, four from SAFA and two independent members – will be deciding on the fate of the fund “within days”.

Needy institutions – non-profit and charity organisations – will soon be invited to put their proposals to the trustees “for scrutiny and approval” along the lines of the lottery fund.

Jordaan, deputy president of SAFA, spent last Sunday near Bronkhorstspruit, north of Pretoria, opening a new pitch which was inaccurately described as having been paid for by the FIFA Legacy Fund in some areas.

The R6.3m ($900,000) project, which also features a clubhouse, has been completed in the rural community of Ekangala.

The development is just one of 52 artificial pitches promised as a World Cup legacy. Four have been completed so far - at Khayelitsha in the Western Cape, Upington in the Northern Cape, and in North West and the Eastern Cape. Two further projects “aiming to give marginalised communities access to quality” are “under construction”.

But those facilities are being paid for by a combination of funds from SAFA and the National Lottery Fund... not by FIFA’s promised Legacy Fund.

Speaking at Ekangala on Sunday, Human Settlements Minister Tokyo Sexwale said: "Before the World Cup we were doubted by everyone, but we managed to pull of one of the most successful and talked about tournaments in FIFA's history.

"We made a promise before the World Cup that we wanted the event to leave a legacy, and the beautiful pitch you see today is a result of all that.

"We cannot have the Radebes, the Pienaars, the Khunes and the Jalis without development, and the new pitch you see here and around the country speaks to that."

Jordaan chose the pragmatic approach. He said: "We want to urge the people here to own this and treat with the care it deserves. We don't want to come back here and see it vandalised, it's for football development, and that's what we want to see."

On a more congratulatory note, he added: "The World Cup was one of the most special moments in our country. The World Cup started when Mandela walked out of prison and ended when he was driven onto that pitch during the closing ceremony and waved to the crowd.

“The tournament saw black and white coming together and co-owning the country just like the non-racial South Africa Nelson Mandela and Oliver Tambo wanted.”

Looking ahead to the slightly-troubled 2014 World Cup in Brazil, he said: “We have established many benchmarks that the next host would have to achieve and surpass.”

Though Jordaan was understandably happy with the tournament he played such a major part in organising with FIFA’s Jerome Valcke, Jordaan will be only too aware of the problems the World Cup has left behind – and it amounts to more than unused stadia.

The 310,000 foreign visitors fell about one-third short of original expectations, and the $521m spent by fans was a long way short of the R33 billion ($4.8bn) the government spent on stadiums, infrastructure, a new airport in Durban, organisation and security.

Which might explain why he is so eager to get FIFA – who have so far reported record revenue of $631m in South Africa - to deliver on their Legacy Fund promise.

Becks says no to Everton and prepares for England's hopeless World Cup bid

DAVID BECKHAM arrived in Zurich for the England’s hopeless 2018 World Cup bid tomorrow insisting he will NOT be returning to play in the Premier League with Everton.

Goodison Park boss David Moyes said he wanted England’s most capped outfield player to join the Blue Merseysiders on loan during the LA Galaxy off-season, having worked with the iconic Becks at the start of his career when he was on loan at Preston North End from Manchester United.

Beckham, a still-sprightly 35, delivered this devastating reply before the World Cup vote in Zurich tomorrow: "Moyesie has done an amazing job at Everton but I am a Manchester United fan.

“It is always great to be wanted by different managers and different teams. Even if it's on loan or a more permanent spell, it's always nice. But it’s too close to home... and United.”

Beckham joins Prime Minister David Cameron and Prince William in England’s “three Lions” strike force at the World Cup ballot tonight. But he knows Russia have emerged as firm favourites to attract the majority of the 23 votes from the much-maligned FIFA Executive Committee in Switzerland tomorrow.

Against the backdrop of new sex revelations – described as a “smear campaign” against England’s best known footballer – Beckham shrugged off the effect of Monday night’s controversial BBC Panorama investigation accusing FIFA officials of involvement in a £64m corruption scandal: “Hopefully I will make a difference. There are many people, like Prince William, who have been involved and working hard for the bid and to get it to this final point.”

Whilst the BBC are unlikely to attract English votes after accusing Brazil’s Ricardo Teixeira, CAF’s Issa Hayatou and CONCACAF chief Nicolas Leoz of taking bribes more than ten years ago, England’s bid team leader Andy Anson insisted: “FIFA gave us a very strong evaluation and have just published an economic study which puts England way ahead of its competitors.

“Of course I’m disappointed with the timing of the Panorama allegations. The FIFA executive committee is a small group of 22 people.

“If you hurt one of them of course it has an impact on others, that’s just inevitable. It won’t win us any votes. But if you combine the two, we clearly have the strongest bid. We have the perfect foundation.”

Sadly, both Anson and Beckham are deluded. England may have the infrastructure and the stadiums, but FIFA President Sepp Blatter loves to give the World Cup to controversial venues, as South Africans are only too aware after 2010. And with the Russians confident of at least ten votes, only five are left for England.

Spain and Portugal, who claim to have wrapped up eight votes already, are second favourites, leaving England ahead of just the environmentally-friendly bid from Holland and Belgium, who may claim no votes at all.

As this correspondent said last week, Russia deserve it – and they’re welcome to it if they really are going to spend £6bn on white elephants as FIFA reap the real rewards.

For further evidence, try this from Arsenal’s pint-sized “meerkat”, Russian ambassador Andrei Arshavin: ''We have never had a World Cup. Hosting it in Russia would open up new minds and new hearts for the game. It would be a completely new chapter for the World Cup.

''Russia is a huge country, the biggest on earth. Everything is extra-large, including the organisation of the game. We are building pitches, football centres, schools and training venurd in the most remote areas of our country, growing the game and providing opportunities for youngsters.

“We are working hard to modernise the infrastructure and we are building stadiums. It has been said that a huge effort is being needed. It is already underway, as can be seen in my native Saint Petersburg with the new stadium that will be finished by late 2012, or in Kazan, Sochi and elsewhere.”

So Russia it is then. Never mind the distances, the corruption, the crime, the reality. You read it here first. And 2022? Given Blatter’s predilection for money and the unusual, expect oil-rich middle-eastern minnows Qatar to beat off impressive bids from Australia, the USA, troubled South Korea and jittery Japan. That’s football.